I love babies.
I've always enjoyed children, and have been good with kids for as long as I can remember. I looked forward to being a mama 'one day.' Now, that day is here, and I am loving every single second of it. And don't want it to ever end. It wasn't long after my son entered this world that I found myself thinking, "I want to do that again. And again. And again." Being a mama has been my favorite job so far.
My house will never be exactly the way I want it.
It will never be perfect. This was semi-true before I had a baby. But it is even more true now that Caleb is here. With him came burp cloths and blankets, baby bottles and breast pumps. Diaper bags and tiny socks. Rash creams and car seats. I have accepted that my home will never be Southern Living perfect. That isn't to say that I don't have days in which I wish my home was Pinterest-worthy with every fiber of my being. But I wouldn't trade my little man in for all the perfect homes in the world. My home looks lived in, and I'm okay with that. Because it is. We live in it. And we love in it. A whole lot.
My body is amazing.
No, I am not a supermodel. No, my body is not flawless. But, I am continually amazed that the perfect little person I call my son came from my own, very imperfect, body. Knowing this has made me love it a little more. We still have our bad days, my body and I. We still have our fights when it doesn't quite look how I want it to. But mostly, I'm just thankful to have it. Thankful for all of the wonderful things it's done for me. I only get one body, so I should learn to love it, right?
Graceful mamas know how to let go.
How have I learned to give myself grace? By letting go of things that aren't necessities. Getting rid of stuff that isn't important. Refusing to allow negativity into our home. Things that were important to me once, now take a backseat to the needs of my son and our family. I am okay with that. Hearing him cry is enough to make me drop anything and everything I might have been doing to see to him. I ache to feel his warm, solid weight in my arms after going all day without it. Cuddling him to my chest, holding his perfect, itty-bitty vulnerable hands, feeling his soft head under my chin and the pitter patter of his tiny heart against mine, is now more important than any task needing attending or any event requesting my presence. And I am also okay with that.
Some things won't ever get done.
At least not when I want them to. I have stacks and stacks of pictures, blank albums, unfinished scrapbooks and memory cards just waiting to be attended to. But you know what got in the way? Life. Life did. And I don't really want to tell my life to hang on for a few minutes or hours while I go spend time trying to record it. No, instead, I'd rather live in the now. If a free minute or two presents itself, great. I'll try to hop to it. But until then, I plan on enjoying every single second with my precious son. He's already growing up too fast, and I don't think he has any plans on slowing down. So I better just snuggle on him for as long as I can, because I know the days of him turning his cheek away from my kisses are coming. And I dread them. So the pictures and projects can wait.
My time is no longer my own.
Being a mama requires an almost total sacrifice of self. And nowhere is this more evident than in the amount of time I spend doing 'me' things - which is now almost nonexistent. I can no longer just come home after work and plop down on the couch for some relaxing in front of the tv. Or go for a run, or to a yoga class. Or bop around town, stopping to shop at my favorite stores or popping into the grocery store for a forgotten ingredient or two. No. Now, everything I do revolves around the little man in my life. When he needs to eat. When he should be sleeping. When it should be bath and story time. There is no more 'couch plopping' - unless of course, he's nursing. There is no more running or workout classes - instead, there are walks with the Baby Bjorn and the stroller. And there is definitely no bopping around town, popping in and out of stores. Anyone who has manipulated a stroller knows that it's really just not worth it to have to haul that thing in and out of the car for non-essential errands. While I adore my son and wouldn't trade being a mama for anything in the world, my time is definitely not my own anymore. And likely will never be again. At least not for a very long time.
Mama's best is enough.
I haven't gotten caught up in the "Mommy Wars" I've heard so much about. Not yet, at least. And I hope to never be part of it. As a mom myself, who is just trying to figure out which end is up most of the time, the last thing I would want to do is pass judgment on another mother. In my opinion, we are all just doing what we thing is best for our children. And who can argue with that? So, so what if your snacks aren't Pinterest perfect? You're still an awesome mom. So what if your baby is formula fed and not breastfed exclusively? You're still an awesome mom. So what if you are a working mom? You're still an awesome mom. You're kid's snacks aren't 100% organic? It's okay. You're still an awesome mom. As a mom, my best is enough for my son. And your best is enough for your children.